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We all have insecurities, but some of our biggest insecurities can be related to work, our careers, relationships, direction, and our worth.
Insecurities can be associated with a lack of confidence, experience, or limiting beliefs you have assigned to yourself. Whatever it may be, there are exercises to overcome a lack of confidence, rid yourself of limiting securities, and finally go after what you want and what you deserve!
Where Do Insecurities Come From?
The top three causes of insecurities, according to Live Bold and Bloom, stem from the following three places:
- Fear of failure and rejection
- Social anxiety and lack of confidence
- Insecurities rooted in perfectionism
Let's explore how to undo insecurities that originate from these common places.
1. Insecurities Due to Fear of Failure or Rejection
Rejection is a scary word, matched by the f-word, failure. Where do these fears come from? Typically, insecurities field by fear of failure come from recent life events. Some life events can include similar failures, which only deepen insecurities. In fact, research on happiness suggests that up to 40% of our “happiness quotient” is based on recent life events.
When you feel uncertain or a lack of confidence, you might be prone to avoiding difficult tasks or uncomfortable scenarios that might end up reinforcing your deepest insecurities.
This might manifest in your career in the following ways:
- Dealing with a difficult client who is left unhappy
- Being rejected from a job or a promotion
- Making a mistake on a substantial project
- Flubbing a public speaking opportunity
- Misunderstanding instructions from your boss
How to Overcome Insecurities Due to Fear of Failure
While you might want to file this under "easier said than done," the best way to overcome a fear of failure or rejection is by fleeing your comfort zone. Lean into the possibility of rejection. Learn from your past failures. Try to let go of old narratives that don't serve you.
2. Insecurities Due to Social Anxiety
Many of us experience a lack of confidence in social settings. In the workplace, this can include all-team meetings, social events, networking events, or industry-specific conferences. The fear of being judged or perceived negatively by others is very real, especially for our more introverted personalities.
- Common Examples of Social Insecurities at Work
- Keeping to yourself
- Avoiding speaking up or raising your hand in meetings
How to Overcome Social Anxiety Insecurities at Work
You can work slowly but surely. Unless you're in a very forward-facing role, take your time building relationships with your coworkers. This can include small gestures like a shared lunch, asking questions about what your coworkers do in their spare time, or building one step at a time.
3. Insecurities Due to Perfectionism
Being a perfectionist might sound like the simplest problem to overcome when dealing with insecurities. However, that couldn't;t be further from the truth.
Perfectionists have high standards for everything they do. As a result, they find themselves disappointed or insecure when they can't achieve their perception of perfection. Anything a perfectionist has decided is "less than perfect" simply will not do. In a career, this can include job titles, salary thresholds, competition with coworkers, the likeability trap, and so on.
Perfectionists often set lofty goals that are either impossible to achieve or that feel empty once achieved. To perfectionists, “good enough” is a failure. And what do perfectionists do to chase perfection? Set big, shiny new goals like a junkie chasing their next fix.
How to Overcome Perfectionist Insecurities at Work
In her article, Goal-Setting for Perfectionists, Dr. Sasha Heinz explains how to set values-based goals instead of outcome-based goals. THis helps perfectionists to "enjoy the journey" instead of fixating on an uncontrollable outcome. This helps perfectionists to "enjoy the journey" instead of fixating on an uncontrollable outcome. This allows perfectionists to welcome a little more uncertainty into their work.
