Six years and ten months. That's how long I was in the professional world before I became a working mom.
Six years and ten months of experience, five years of schooling to earn a bachelor's and master's degree, and seventeen years of life experience before that, and yet nothing could prepare me for motherhood.
It didn't matter how many books I read or how much advice I received; the day my son was born, so was a mother—a working mother, to be exact.
Adding "Mom" to My Resume
I always knew I wanted to be a mom. That wasn't a hard decision for me. I've also always known I wanted to work. This may shock people, but I love to work. I wouldn't know what to do with my time if I were a lady of leisure. I was the child begging for chores to make a few dollars. I had jobs and internships throughout college. I had a full-time job lined up a year before I graduated from my graduate program.
My career is as much a part of my identity as being a mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, and a friend. Becoming a mother and not working was never up for debate. And thus, I became a working mother.
I became one of the 72% of U.S. mothers with children under 18 who are employed. According to a 2018 Pew Research Center analysis of Census Bureau Current Population Survey data, 55% of U.S. mothers are employed full-time, and another 17% are employed part-time.
Of course, that's not taking into account the effects the COVID-19 pandemic has had on mothers in the workforce. In a March 2021 article, the U.S. Stated Census Bureau stated, "Many moms have given up and left the workforce since the pandemic hit: nearly three-quarters of a million (705,000) more have given up on work outside the home entirely, and some may not return. Those who do resume work may experience decreased total lifetime earnings due to dropping out or being forced out during the pandemic."
I am fortunate and beyond grateful to still have a job and a career in communications that I love. But in June of last year, my heart learned of a new kind of love, the kind I have for my son. Now almost a year into motherhood, I still feel the pull of both as they tung on my heartstrings. The cry of my son who needs me vs. the ding of an email for my job. Cue the mom guilt.
The Perception of Motherhood and Work
It goes without saying that my child is my world, but my work, in addition to my livelihood, is a part of who I am. I strongly believe I am the best version of myself when I'm working. I know that working is what's best for me and my family. But I can imagine that not everyone feels the same.
Hence the motherhood penalty. A term coined by sociologists, the motherhood penalty, argues that working mothers experience systematic disadvantages in the workplace, like less pay, decreased benefits, lack of perceived competence, and lack of commitment when compared to women without children.
There is a perception that women with children don't work as hard and are less committed to their jobs because they are distracted by their caregiving responsibilities. 41% of employed Americans perceive working moms to be less devoted to their work, according to Bright Horizons 2018 Modern Family Index. This stereotype hurts not only women but also the companies who fall victim to believing it.
The Value Mothers Add
Both careers and motherhood are work. Using Salary.com's calculator, if a working mom with one child under the age of five were to earn a salary, they'd be bringing in around $70,000. Seriously. It's work.
Although the responsibilities are clearly different, both day jobs and parenting require experience and expertise. The skills learned in one facet of life can often be used to complement the other. These experiences at work and at home are a powerful combination and can be seen as an advantage of employing working mothers.
According to Bright Horizons 2018 Modern Family Index, 84% of employed Americans believe that having working moms in leadership roles will make a business more successful. Working mothers add value to the workforce and workplace in a multitude of ways. To start, here are three.
We Want to Work
Careers provide a source of pride and purpose. One could argue so does motherhood, but work fulfills a different need and desire than parenting. While the financial benefit of working is a clear motivation for both men and women in the workplace, working isn't just about the money.
Bright Horizons’ 2018 Modern Family Index states that 74% of moms work because they love their careers. Mothers are motivated and driven. When a mom goes to work, they are sacrificing precious time with their children, but in exchange, they know they're receiving fulfillment and satisfaction through their work.
We're working because we want to be. If we're asking to be in the meeting, it's because we want to be. If we’re asking for the promotion, it’s because we know we’re qualified. Sometimes we may take a Zoom call at home with a sick child, or we opt for a top knot instead of a polished blowout, but that doesn't mean we are any less committed to our work.
Motherhood Elevates Our Expertise
When you think of the following qualities, who comes to mind: great listener, skilled at time management, team player, and calm under pressure? Whether you thought of a mom or an employee, you're right. Becoming a mother helps us develop new skills and hones the skills we already have. The experiences at home and work complement each other more than one might initially think.
Moms can prioritize like no other. We have to pick our battles, like having a clean house versus having a happy baby, so when it comes to to-do lists, you bet we can handle it. We are also making a choice to work. We are giving up time with our children and giving it to a company.
You better believe that we're going to make the most of that time. If you've ever tried to squeeze in a shower, a deadline, that nagging task on your to-do list, and five minutes of blissful relaxation into an unquantifiable nap time, you get it.
Support Us, and We'll Support You
According to The Mom Project's 2019 Building a Better Workplace Report, 83% of women say they would be willing to leave a job for a role that better supports their desired workplace criteria. The same report goes on to say that 75% of women surveys ranked their manager's and organization's support for having the flexibility to balance work and professional life as the most critical criteria in job selection in terms of feeling respected at work.
If you value our expertise as professionals, support us as mothers. Work-life balance does not exist, especially not during the last year when the lines of work-life integration began to seriously blur. Mothers who want to work and are dedicating their time to a company want to be appreciated and supported.
It all comes down to trust. Moms are the hardest workers I know. They’re loyal, intelligent, and devoted to their work and their children. If a company trusts an employee to get the job done, employees will trust them, thus being loyal and supporting the company's goals and objectives.
I have six years and ten months of professional experience as a childless worker, and I have nine months of professional experience as a professional with a son. That makes seven and a half years of relevant experience and expertise to bring to an organization. All of that experience adds value.
My experience as a mother does not devalue my experience as an employee. I plan to continue adding value through my learned experiences as a working parent because I love being a mom, and I love being an employee. Most importantly, I love not having to choose between the two.
